Ok, so here is today...sorting thru toyboxes..I swear to god, my daughter has way more shit than I ever did as a kid..Im constantly throwing things out, brick-a-brack mostly..little things..where do these little things come from its like they fucking multiply in the night! It was supposed to rain here today, oh..in case you didnt know it I have this storm phobia..im not sure if there is a technical name for the fear of storms but I have it..It pissed of rain for like a second..then it went on its merry way..the day was a wash..I was supposed to help "him" paint etc..didnt happen...oh well it never does.

So im sitting here dying my hair blonde..yes..ive never been a blonde before..so im testing a theory in a way, and hair dye was on sale..who dosent like a good sale?? We shall see..

I need something to move me out of this inertia..this consant feeling of going but goinging nowhere..like Carlos Castenada and that Yaqui indian...he used to slap in square in the back between the shoulder blades and Carlos had his reality shifted.. I need me some of that. Im on these drugs, but thinking that I need the antidepressants the psych gave me a script for, I cannot shake this maudlin feeling, this sadness somwhere in the back of my head/heart/soul...What is the world comming to? Here I sit with all the pleasures I could ever want, and still I need antidepressants...I could be living in a fucking mud hut in the middle of NoWhere..and just have to smile and deal..just DEAL...

PEACE!

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♦ French Toast Assassin is .

♦ French Toast Assassin is .

♦ French Toast Assassin is .